Review: Geox "Shoes"

Breathing takes time and time costs money. Money costs more money and more money takes credit. Credit demands low-risk behavior and low-risk behavior can be accomplished if and only if one is on bare feet.

But I'm a risk-taker. I take the kinds of risks that no bare-footed person would ever dare. So, I needed some shoes. But, since my shoes were likely to incite me to take bigger risks, I was not likely to have the credit necessary to finance the money to pay for the time that it takes me to breathe.

Fortunately, however, my new Geox shoes do all of the breathing for me. Hence, I don't have to worry about any of these things anymore. I can just be my risky old self, flirting with foot injuries and taunting hippies with sharp surfaces underfoot.

UPDATE:

After approximately six months, my Geox "Shoes" have mostly disintegrated, rendering them laughable as footwear. At this point, they consist mostly of holes rather than shoe. They have, however, become considerably more breathable. I often think about them when I walk down the street in my new Clarks, my feet gasping breathlessly for air.